And they say the Brits are supposed to be more civilized than us Yanks.

A story that appeared Tuesday in the Independent, a tabloid in the United Kingdom, offered up a crazy yarn between two neighbors that left one’s home damaged to the tune of more than a quarter-million dollars and the other behind bars.

The man under arrest, identified as Mark Coates, was described by the presiding judge as a “human wrecking ball” after he smashed a hole through the roof of his semi-detached home in East Sussex, England, about 15 miles west of the English Channel, and climbed onto the roof.

Once there, Coates reportedly went to town, tearing tiles and chimney pots off the £450,000 (≈$582,500) home and throwing them to the ground. 

After destroying his roof, he turned his attention to his duplex neighbor, Janice Turner, who called police, watched Coates destroy her property. She reportedly just sat in her garden and cried. 

Police captured a scene on video where Coates used a hammer to smash the roof of both homes amid the two-hour stand-off.

In 120 minutes, Coates reportedly caused more than $260,000-worth of damage to his and his neighbor’s home before finally being taken into custody.

Coates was subsequently found guilty of two counts of criminal damage to the properties, handed an indefinite restraining order, and sentenced to four years and four months in prison.

He did, however, beat two additional counts of fear of violence or harassment by Lewes Crown Court, the Independent reported.

But why? 

The prosecutor, Kings Counsel Ben Williams, said the deliberate destruction was a “revenge attack” on his neighbors, calling the 57-year-old husband and father of five "a human wrecking ball,” which left his neighbors, Turner, 66, and her partner David Greenwood, 69, “upset and traumatized.”

The craziest part of this crazy story — if it's possible to get more crazy: the dispute had been ongoing for seven years!

“He was systematically and vindictively destroying the property," Greenwood said. "He cut a hole through the joists; he took the staircase out of his house; [he aimed] to destroy and diminish its value: It was calculating and spiteful.”

How it all began

The Independent  reported that the dispute began when a fence panel collapsed. After installing a new fence, concerns emerged regarding potential encroachment. The disagreement continued - year in and out - until the end of last June.

After years of litigation, the case eventually went to the High Court, equivalent to a state Supreme Court; there, the judge admonished the litigants that the row could result in “financial ruin” for one or both of them.

A ruling was made against Coates for contempt; he was handed a £475,000 (≈$615,000) fine and ordered to sell his home to satisfy the judgment. His rampage took place three days before he was supposed to relinquish the house keys.

In different video footage, Coates could be overheard telling officers: “I’ve had this house stolen off me by a judge and corrupt police. I’ll cause as much damage as I can to devalue the house.”

The Independent reported Coates said he wanted the charges to be “so serious” that he would get a trial by jury — then he could "expose" officials who had used “corruption and bias” to strip him of his home.

A nearby resident, who asked not to be named, offered a fairly understated observation to the Independent: “Coates has got to be one of the worst neighbors in Britain.”

Richard Body, Coates' defense attorney, said his client was a dedicated family man with a previous good character. “However, he has an aspect of his character that is stubborn, which is how he has got himself into this very unfortunate position.”

Also, fairly understated. It must be a British thing.

That Robert Frost, prescient as always.